Just Being Me, John Paul G

Dear Friends,

It’s been a while since I blogged. So I’ve decided to write something I was thinking about. And I think most of you guys can relate to this. It’s about relationships (again??!!) :-p Ever wondered why some relationships work and some don’t? When things go bad, and a breakup happens, one naturally blames the other for the failure. Finger pointing is easy but what’s the actual cause?

My friend A.N. asked me why girls keep telling her bout their sad stories of their relationships to her. “Why they constantly dwell in their miseries?” “Why it happened the way it did?” A.N. is a little annoyed that they are so fragile and “dependent” when it comes to bad times in relationships. Irritating when it happens all too often, right?

Another friend S.T. asked me “Why is it when we’re there for them when they need us during hard times with their boyfriends, but when all is well, and when we’re the ones hurting when I have a bad time in my relationship, they forget you?”

One more friend F.D. asked me “Why guys get the wrong impression when we’re nice to them?” “Why does this guy give me hopes but in the end, just want to be friends?”

L.R. said to another friend J.T. in front of me “Why get upset over just 1 girl. So many more out there. Why stoop so low for 1 bloody girl?” “Why sacrifice so much when she obviously is not that into you?” “You deserve better or she doesn’t deserve you!”

C.J. asked “Why are some guys so screwed?” “What is it with guys and commitments?” “What’s wrong with me JP (me), why doesn’t he want me?”

After talking about relationship with them and debating about issues pertaining to them, I have developed some opinions on a few things about relationships. These advice/opinions are taken from an email received from F.D.:

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For those of you who are Playboys / Playgirls:
Never say, "I love you" if you don't care. Never talk about feelings if they aren't there. Never touch a life if you mean to break a heart. Never look in the eye when all you do is lie. The cruelest thing a guy can do to a girl is to let her fall in love when he doesn't intend to catch her fall. Ladies, it works both ways aight?

For those of you who are Heartbroken:
Heartbreaks last as long as you want and cut as deep as you allow them to go. The challenge is not how to survive heartbreaks but to learn from them. Time heals all things? Some people don’t understand the meaning of it. For me, it’s time that enables us to separate ourselves from that person, gives you time to think bout it, analyze if you want to. If you’re smart enough, makes you stronger and not allow it to repeat again. Why get into something that causes you hurt, again?

For those of you who are Naive:
How to be in love: Fall but don't stumble, be consistent but not too persistent, share and never be unfair, understand and try not to demand, and get hurt but never keep the pain. Read it again, and try understanding it.

For those of you who are Possessive:
It breaks your heart to see the one you love happy with someone else but it's more painful to know that the one you love is unhappy with you. Learn to let go. I feel, if it it’s both ways, don’t try assuming it’s a highway, because it’s a one way street my friends! Get that into you head!

For those of you who are Afraid to confess:
Love hurts when you break up with someone. It hurts even more when someone breaks up with you. But love hurts the most when the person you love has no idea how you feel. I think some of you can relate very well to this.

For those of you who are Still holding on:
A sad thing about life is when you meet someone and fall in love, only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and that you have wasted years on someone who wasn't worth it. If that person isn't worth it now he or she is not going to be worth it a year or 10 years from now. Do both yourselves a favor and LET GO…

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Personally, I feel there is no such thing as the perfect person for you. Just have to find someone who will want to spend the rest of his or her life with you. Arguments and misunderstanding must happen to learn more about each other, learn from mistakes and be better partners. Tolerating, being patient and “give & take” has to take place in order for relationships to work. Don’t try changing your loved one too much for your sake, just be accommodating and understanding. Discuss everything and work it out. Develop an understanding and realize that some things are best left the way they are.

After all this is done, let love play its part and lead the way...